WHAT IS SYLVIA UP TO IN 2011 ? |
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The trip started out auspiciously with the Dalai Lama joining us on the flight from Newark NJ to Frankfurt, Germany. I noticed his holiness and his entourage at the gate boarding first and thought FANTASTIC - I just got a tiny glimpse of the Dalai Lama.
With a beginning like that the trip to Turkey could only continue to be an amazing experience. 'Turkey is an absolutely gorgeous country with mountains, lakes, rivers and the Mediterranean sea. It was very clean, people were so friendly and the food fantastic! Traveling with someone with disabilities (wheelchair & walker) who is living the final days of his life was very intense with many magical moments and tears as we remembered the active, adventurous man Fred was and began to accept the man he is now and the future yet to come. As Patanjali explains in the Yoga Sutras - one thing we can count on is that our lives will always change. We are all dying from the moment we are born, but what makes the difference when we are told our clock is ticking and time is running out? One of our fellow travelers, a yoga teacher from New York, explained it well - we all still have hope - hope that we will live long lives, hope that that day won't come for a long time, the hope is one of the beautiful things that keeps us going, but sometimes the 'reality' of our situation can be extremely helpful too, when we savor each moment and cherish who we are and where we are in our lives right now. Knowing that nothing is permanent and for me the realization that the practice of Yoga and Patanjali's teachings help us with this journey." Sylvia Whelchel ‘Moments of Being’This beautiful piece was written by one of the fellow travelers and posted on Fred's Blog: The term ‘ Moments of Being’ was used by Virginia Woolf to describe particularly intense brief moments in which everyday life was transcended and a deeper more spiritual reality was apprehended. What we will remember from our magnificent trip, more than the beauty of mosques and monuments or the sights of nature, will be such moments often involving human contact of a genuine and intense form in which a hidden aspect of a person’s character is spontaneously revealed. But perhaps the most intense ‘moments of being’ were my observation of the relationship between two of our travelers Fred and Sylvia.
As I got to know Fred during many fascinating conversations during our trip together what emerged was his extraordinary courage, his will to live life to the fullest draining his limited supply of energy in spite of his being afflicted by a deadly incurable neurological disease, ALS, with a very grim prognosis. He never complained when part of our journey had to be denied him. He never felt sorry for himself and would usually regale us with his characteristic good humor about some amusing incidents which had befallen him while sitting at a café with his companion. His unbelievable optimism was allied with a capacity to give freely of himself which in my 50 years of medical practice I have never encountered before in a man suffering from a fatal disease. His generosity is awesome. On one occasion one of our travelers required a brief hospitalization late one evening because of GI symptoms. To my amazement Fred already retired, having gotten wind of what was unfolding had gotten up and wanted single handedly to accompany the patient to the hospital saying that because of his illness he knew how to manage the intricacies of hospital emergency rooms.
Yet Fred is so buoyant that he could sometimes forget his limitations. An avid hiker skier and rock climber before his illness he once tried to hoist himself and put his head through a life buoy over the side of our boat. Fortunately some of us jumped up and caught him in time! Perhaps the most moving moments were those involving interactions between Fred and Sylvia. The two had a deep loving and caring attitude for each other. Because of the harmony and tight connection they often did not need words to communicate with each other. Sylvia knew how to entertain him patiently playing games of cribbage and backgammon teasing him when she won. She cared for Fred like a devoted mother looking after her injured child. At other times it seemed like Fred was caring for Sylvia trying to soften the blows of harsh reality. But there was also a third aspect to their relationships. They would a times break out into irrepressible laughter and giggle like two teenagers oblivious of what was happening around them, two children playing in the sand without a care in the world.
My last snapshot of the pair occurred during an archeological museum visit. Nedime was describing to the group the details of a number of Roman Sarcophagi. While listening to her erudite lecture I heard peals of laughter coming from another part of the museum. I assumed these were some young school children probably bored by the exhibit and trying to entertain themselves. When I went over to investigate I came across Fred and Sylvia having the time of their lives full of hilarity and, unable to contain their mirth. What was going on ? It was only when I saw one of the pictures they took that I understood what was happening. (picture) Sylvia was standing to the side of a statue missing an arm probably the goddess Aphrodite, and she was putting her own arm in just the right position of the stump creating the illusion of a full live arm. I pause on this image because I believe that in an uncanny way behind the joke, it silently offered a powerful metaphor of the beauty and power of their relationship.
A final commentary is necessary about Fred’s moving attitude towards death. He accepts its inevitability perhaps sooner than he would wish but with the conviction that he has lived his life fully without regret, having done more things than ten average men, climbed more mountains, seen more countries, tried more dangerous endeavors and survived critical injuries which would have felled most of us. He is continuing to spend a great deal of time giving to others and feeling fulfilled. Yes we can say he has lived a full and rich life. It is quite remarkable that in these powerful moments his main concern is about easing the grief of those loved ones he must inevitably leave behind. This is a true human spirit at its most noble. If there is a God in Heaven, he will look down on this man and say to himself: ’you know I have to admit I may have fucked up many times but this one I did right. He will be one of the righteous and live an eternal life with me. The throngs of people he touched and loved will never forget him. I feel fortunate to be one amongst them. In loving tribute. Francis Baudry 3 Responses to “‘Moments of Being’”1. Gary Bakkala (Fred's Son-in-law) says: Francis, Sylvia, Can’t wait for the Noble 2011 Garden Party! Thanks again, 2. Dominique Baudry says: This is Francis and Christianne’s youngest daughter, Dominique. After 3 weeks of not having my daily check in with my parents, I was anxious to hear about their latest adventures abroad. I was fully prepared to hear about the mosques, the art, the hikes, the food, and the local people. Whereas I did hear about these topics to some degree, 99% of their stories were about Fred or Fred and Sylvia. Fred. Though I have not met you, I know that you are an extraordinary man. You possess that rare yet wonderful combination of charm, zest for life, appreciation for the things that you have, and joie de vivre. I admire your passion, your tenacity, and your uncanny ability to make everyone around you feel happy. I wish you the very best and feel grateful that my parents had the opportunity to meet you. Dominique Baudry (San Francisco, CA) 3. Arboledo says:
This was to be my last trip before I become totally incapacitated. Six months ago I had my doubts about making the trip to Turkey. I wrestled with the idea right up to two weeks before the trip. Much like preparing for a climb up Everest. I got the necessary permits, (doctors approval) my climbing gear, (wheel chair, walker & crutches) my Sherpa, (Sylvia) and the Turkey support team. Your Father became the journalist that would document this climb. The love and support I received on this trip gave me renewed strength, The writtings of your Father has touched not only me but everyone who has the good fortune to read it. It is truly a brilliant piece of work. I am blessed and if there is a good thing to say about ALS, it is that I am receiveing much love and support from old friends and new friends such as yourself. There is a message here and that is, don’t wait until someone has a fatal disease to tell them you love them, do it now. The Journey continues and of course I am planning on my next last trip. Like, who’s going to stop me? |
I have been in Turkey this past month with my very good friend and father figure - Fred Noble - who has been diagnosed with ALS last year (Lou Gehrigs disease). For Fred's amazing experience 
Then I wished that I had my camera to take a picture - now he'll be squirreled away to a 1st class exclusive private section of the plane. But.... surprise, surprise or not... he was seated in 'Business class' and I was able to stop and shake his hand and take a picture. Fred and I ended up sitting just 4 rows behind - amazing !
The catalogue describing the trip requirements states the following: ’this trip is only for physically fit and healthy travelers and is not appropriate for travelers using wheelchairs walkers or other mobility aids. Agility and balance are required for boarding, disembarking and walking on deck during our gullet cruise. Thus I was quite surprised to see arriving in the Armada Hotel in Istanbul a smiling and chatty gentleman with walker and wheelchair escorted by a very attractive and vibrant young woman.
I will never forget the vision of Fred in his wheelchair during our school visit having the time of his life surrounded by laughing and giggling children eager trying to reach out to get some of the wristbands and balloons he had brought along as gifts, inflating them and putting them on the head or around the neck of delighted children. He had as much fun as they did. What a lesson in life!
In one instance Fred had decided to trying to swim off our gullet. In spite of his determination and his life jacket he was beginning to be above his head, Sylvia watching over him; obviously concerned had a very mobile expression in her face rapidly alternating between concern, then moving close to him unobtrusively to steady him and rescue him without humiliating him and at the same time laughing to comfort him and to give him courage. The shift in emotions took only a few seconds but it was for me a beautiful mirror of her empathy, love and support for him.
Fred because of the ravages of his illness, having lost much of the power in his legs is a bit like the statue with broken arms and here is Sylvia generously lending her youth her love and her life to enable the statue to be complete once more and to regain what it had lost through the unforgiving ravages of time. This playful game captures the essence of their admirable and loving relationship. It is a model not to be soon forgotten. Fred is indeed fortunate to have the companionship of this extraordinary young woman. Although human in form she has the grace of a gazelle as she climbs arduous paths, bare feet or jumps from the high bridge of our ship disappearing under water swimming like a nymph, or assumes like a goddess a majestic yoga pose high on a rock
Thank you so much Dominique.